The April 2026 Special Issue of the Family Court Review introduces “eldering” — acknowledging aging as an evolving relational role, recognizing interdependencies within the family system. These Top 10s reflect contributions from the authors in this special issue, as well as discussions with participants in our workshop* on skill building to reduce multigenerational conflict at the 2025 AFCC Annual Conference. In an interdisciplinary family-law context (judges, attorneys, practitioners, mediators, parenting and eldercaring coordinators) eldering means shifting to a family systems perspective, which enhances stability and builds resilience. We apply eldering best when we learn from each other’s professional lenses—legal clarity, clinical insight, resolution skills, and coordination strategies—so the family experiences one coherent, bridge-building approach. Listening to multigenerational voices with an eldering framework enhances AFCC’s mission to “improve the lives of children and families through the resolution of family conflict.”

1. Identify interdependencies between family members, including supportive behaviors and those that disrupt. Actions of one family member have a bidirectional impact on others. Avoid categorizations (e.g., presumptions of life stages or binary framings like dependent/independent or fit/unfit) that block a full picture of individuals, the care they give and need, and how they interact with one another (Crampton & Fuller, 2026).
2. Encourage proactive discussions and facilitate planning documents to help families avoid potential conflict and litigation regarding a myriad of issues (e.g., care needs, medical decisions, finances) from the youngest to the oldest generations in the family. (Cahn & Papernow, 2026).
3. Appreciate the importance of diverse family structures, including chosen family and the strong connections that can contribute to well-being and resilience, particularly for those who may have been marginalized, excluded, or isolated for having unique needs and challenges (Harris-Britt & Ordway, 2026; Mars et al., 2026). 
4. Identify ways to strengthen the family system, especially through times of transition (e.g., separation, divorce, death), to avoid later ruptures that may lead to estrangement between parents and children (Whiting & Coleman, 2026). Narrative ethics urges awareness of what we are listening for, our relation to the “storyteller,” and what our profession requires of us, before we respond (Tetunic & Bergan, 2026).
5. Screen to deduce typology of conflict and identify intergenerational dynamics that support or impede caregiving efforts for all ages within the family. Understanding more about those dynamics allow professionals to choose interventions that can address trust, cohesion, and gatekeeping behaviors (Saini et al., 2026).
6. Adapt strategies and processes traditionally used for the younger or older sectors to the other side of the age continuum within families (O’Brien et al., 2026; Fieldstone & Bronson, 2026). Specific training and knowledge are crucial before applying new processes (e.g., family or elder mediation,  parenting or eldercaring coordination) and adjusting skills to meet the needs of different ages, cultural contexts, and jurisdictional frameworks.
7. Focus-Forward to reorient energy from blame to problem solving, forging measurable and shared progress. When clients are stuck in grievance loops about the past, professionals can invite a future image: “What can we do to make things better?” Find a single, observable micro-move that can enhance the conversation and support a more positive focus. When small wins compound, eldering moves from aspirational to actionable.
8. Reframe intention without excusing impact by coupling responses that reinforce self-determination with validation to lower defensiveness. “I think you meant to keep dad safe: how can we do that while still respecting his autonomy?” Acknowledge their perspective, clarify needs, and foster ownership. When modeling respect plus accountability, people feel heard and may become more willing to try different behaviors. Through a supportive, non-punitive tone, compliance may rise as individuals see how the plan serves their goals.
9. Ask curious questions to de-escalate discord, restore dignity, and stimulate problem-solving across generations. When an older parent shuts down, or a stepparent becomes reactive when challenged, shift from “Why did you—?” to “What would it be like if…?” or “How might it work for two weeks?”
10. Address gatekeeping behaviors (e.g., “There is no good time for you to visit your grandchild/parent!) by encouraging access to information and time with children or older adults. Help families create safe communication and access plans that reinforce respectful boundaries, with clear expectations to reduce reactivity between generations and guard against abuse. Eldering protects bonds while honoring safety and boundaries.

These strategies “build bridges” and lay the foundation for multigenerational support—the heart of eldering practice— as roles, identity, power, and interdependencies within families shift throughout lifespans. We hope you enjoy the upcoming Special Issue of the Family Court Review and look for more insights, case examples, and practical approaches in Seattle at our workshop: Eldering in Family Law: Interdependencies and Influences of Older Generations.

(Items 7-10 attributed to *Don’t Burn Your Bridges: Skill Building to Reduce Multigenerational Conflict, Workshop, AFCC 62nd Annual Conference, May 2025)

 Linda B. Fieldstone, MEd (left) & Sue Bronson, MSW (right)
Co-chairs Association for Conflict Resolution/Florida Chapter of the Association of Family and Conciliation Courts Elder Justice Initiative for Eldercaring Coordination